"More About My Concept Of Complete Recovery"

This website was written for people with addictions looking for addiction treatment and complete recovery. I can guarantee any addict complete recovery if they're willing to recover. I spent more than 35 years addicted to heroin and alcohol. I have recovered from that addiction. I was able to recover when I became willing to deal with myself.

Whether people are in the midst of an addiction, looking for detox, dealing with early addiction recovery, or looking for an ultimate direction as a recovered addict - it all comes down to dealing with ourselves. As I remain drug free, continue to write about addiction and look at life I find it impossible not to write about things people usually don't associate with addiction.

What I find is everything is connected and effects everything else. We live in a Symbiotic Interdependent Universe. My thoughts about life have an effect on your life and vise verse. There is no disconnected people or isolated condition. We can never understand addiction without understanding people, society - and life itself. So I use a holistic approach to addiction recovery.

If you are an addict and need help you'll find it here.

Addiction Detox: First Things First

Have you detoxed as well as possible? There's more to it than not using for 30 days. Read these pages and watch the videos associated with detox.

    Detox And Addiction
    How to end an addiction
    Detox Diet

Ending an addiction is not on anybody's list of fun things to do. When we decide to put a stop to our addictions we start to deal with pain. Pain, fear, anxiety, confusion and frustration are waiting for us. It's this that makes staying clean so hard. It's not something anybody wants to do. The same goes for becoming an addict.

No one has ever planned on being addicted. Nobody I've ever talked to or heard about want's to stay addicted. No one wants to suffer. There is a saying in the recovery community that goes - my worst day sober was better than my best day as an addict. When I was starting out I couldn't imagine what a good day would be like. I had no good feelings. No good ideas. I can say now that I agree with that statement.

If I don't do drugs I have a chance of being happy. If I do drugs, if I practice any mood altering addiction, I only postpone the possibility of real happiness. That would be "my best day in addiction". Being insane and postponing any chance at happiness and sanity. Bad days sober are, at the very least, opportunities to make progress. Here is a promise I can make, when faced with the choice of practicing an addiction or not practicing the addiction - In the long run - not practicing the addiction is always easier.

I've laid out most of what I've come to see as the "keys to recovering" from any addiction. The only thing you will need to do is make decisions. Make choices. Never more than one at a time. Like I said, this site is here to help you recover from whatever addictions or habitual behaviors you may have. Habitual behaviors include worrying, anxiety, stress, fear, anger and so on. I don't know anybody that doesn't suffer from this type of habitual behavior. There are differences in degree but I've never met anyone who is free from them. We are all in the same boat as humans.It's only a matter of dealing with the problem.

Addiction or Sanity

For all of us who are, or have been addicted, there is never the surety of our own sanity. Most of us are escaping from a world that we see as insane. Is what goes on in the world around us sane? For the most part I would have to say no. The problem with escaping is it leads us to our own form of insanity. In the end, instead of escaping, we end up becoming part of the whole insanity problem. Especially if we escape through drugs. Drugs eat away the brains capacity to function. That's the simplest way to put it. I could spend pages and hours in detailed explanation but it's already been written. I have included a lot of the writings here and you can get the details. But right now I want to get started on understanding the importance of sanity.

Your happiness is directly related to your sanity. Your sanity is directly related to your understanding of life. All life. Everything that takes place around us and in us. Until we stop the addiction we can't move on to a deeper understanding of life. Granted a lot of addicted people may have a better understanding of life than some people who don't have a bothersome addiction. This is not relevant to our recovery process. If we think we have a good understanding of life but we're still addicted then our understanding isn't good - enough. There is nothing stopping us from improving our understanding - we can start right here, right now.

No one in this world has all the understanding necessary to give a complete picture of life or addiction. We have some information. Some observations. Some theories. Here is one observation about addiction I have found to be very helpful: What ends up as an addiction always begins as a reaction to an environment. Everything begins as a reaction to an environment. It's always a combination of the inner and outer environment. Addiction is a condition that takes form, over time, as a result of escape from an environment. We: our brains, our ideas, beliefs and understandings are part of that environment. These ideas, beliefs, understandings and so on...these thoughts...are what I refer to as "the inner environment". This is all explained in detail as we go along. If this, or anything, isn't fully understandable that's OK for right now. There's no pressing need to understand all aspects of addiction to stop practicing the addiction. The only thing that matters right now is that we start the process that leads to being happy and living happier healthier lives. Without the happiness part, why would anyone want to quit?

Let me assure you that happiness is possible. For everyone. My objective is that you and I be sane and happy. All the addiction stuff is just stuff. The only reason it has any significance to us at all is that, in order to be completely sane and happy, it needs to stop. All insane behavior stands in the way of our happiness. Addiction is insane behavior.

About this site

I've written a guided diagnostic of the 12 step process used by the founders of the AA program. As an introduction to principles I think it's unsurpassed. I do find that some points are not covered. I go over these in depth. One thing we find out, if we go to some meetings and observe the people who have been there a while, is that anyone can stay clear of their primary addiction. Not just anybody in their right mind. Not just people with a modicum of good sense, of good character or exceptional discipline but Literally anybody. So it's not a matter of ones mental or biological make up. Also, it's not just going through the steps. I know people that have been sober for years and never taken the steps. Others claim to have taken the steps and continue to slip.

I reasoned that there is a cause and effect system that works universally and I have done my best to include a clear explanation of that system here. I write more as I discover it and update the "addiction help" sections at least once a week. At the time of this writing: may 6th, 2009; the site has officially been up for four months. Get in touch with me, and others, through the Forum if you want to share helpful information and ideas.

Personal Addiction Experience

It has been suggested that I include my personal experience with the issues being discussed. At the age thirteen or fourteen I did heroin and it relieved me of my problems. They just went away. I looked at all the things, people, peoples actions, peoples schools and ideas that used to bother me and although I could still see them, it no longer concerned me. For the next 35 years I had one primary goal. To stay in that state of non-concern. I drank until I could no longer physically tolerate it. My liver could not deal with any more alcohol. I was able to stay submerged with heroin but that also had it's physical consequences and limits. Although I'm not going to get in to detail I will state for the record: I've seen some very bad things, done a lot of things I'm not proud of and lived through the guilt, anger and fear associated with "my life". Although I can still experience these unhealthy emotional states they are, for the most part, gone. I'm no longer confused or overwhelmed by what goes on in the world of people. This is not to say I'm not affected from my involvement with it. It's just that when negative emotions arise, I no longer have to react to them. After all, I made them.

When I went into my last chemical detox facility I weighed 146 lbs. I now have a healthy weight of 190 lbs. I was at the end of the line and followed all the suggestions made by the people in the facility. I just went where they said I should go and did what they said I should do. At 90 days I slept for 4 hours without waking. Up until then barely a solid hour was to be had. So I was, as you can imagine, quite crazy and very unhealthy. There was nothing to do but take it. So that's what I did.

We are all able to progress towards a self determined path.

What can you expect? Like I was told by a mentor who collected me from detox, "It's all uphill from here". Having made the climb I can tell you this: I have no desire to go through it again. Ever...