"Who is it that loves and who that suffers? He alone stages a play with Himself; who exists save Him? The individual suffers because he perceives duality. It is duality which causes all sorrow and grief. Find the One everywhere and in everything and there will be an end to pain and suffering."
Cause & EmotionAs I've lived I've discovered a few things about dealing with emotional suffering. Part of dealing with the pain of emotional suffering is managing the reaction. Developing the habit of a lesser reaction to emotional pain and the fear of emotional pain. The lesser reaction is overreactions opposite. To think about what people do to others makes my gut ball up and my heart ache. This emotional pain drove me to find an escape from these feelings. I never had good luck in the escape from emotional misery department. I've have managed to find some breathing room.
I guess there is something to the never getting more than we can handle clause. I guess the fact that I seem to be stuck with the reality of things means I can take it. It seems if people can't deal with high levels of sadness and emotional pain they are made with the ability to ignore things. I never had the ability, or never got got taught how, to not dwell on things.
As I've lived I've learned something about dealing with the pain of emotional suffering and the fear of emotional pain. I've learned something about emotional biochemical reactions. To some degree I can lessen these reactions. I've also learned to only use my own value system. This is part of my "Self Determined Path". I don't adhere to other peoples moral, ethical, judicial codes of value and conduct. I'm relatively free of that now.
Early on I'd adopted the role of the rescuing hero. Every book and TV show has one, if it's a good book or TV show. People want to think there is a solution to evil. We like it when evil is defeated. We utilize the hero archetype in our every day lives to give us hope of a happy ending. Playing the hero role not only didn't defeat evil it added guilt - for my failure to defeat evil. Now I was sad and ashamed. I lived like that most of my life. It sucked.
I still have those roles operating within me (duality). They are not as dominant now, but they're there. Knowing they're there helps. I know some of my reaction to human suffering is an adopted role. The truth is I don't like not being the hero even now. Along the same vein, is it my responsibility to change the world? If I think it's my responsibility to change the world - why do I think that? Where did I get that idea? I know for myself it came from something outside me. Most likely books and TV. In part, I am what I am. In part, I am playing a role.
Are my emotional states a reaction to reality or a reaction to an idea? I don't want to react to an idea unless it's my idea. At least I want to know what I'm reacting to, fully understand it's source and manage myself as I see fit.
I get some good results when:
- I attempt to discard all ideas of knowing that derive from thinking. I've adopted the system of Donoism. I really don't know much of anything. I don't know why I'm here or what happens next.
- I practice connecting to anything that exists at a higher awareness than the apparent Me. Any higher awareness that knows what it is and what I am. This practice has smoothed me out some
Today, when I see the reality of people, I still get sad. We are a sad species. We commit atrocities. Our history is that of great wisdom, kindness and invention. At the same time we do the most hideous things to each other. Can I change things? Not today. Not by myself.
My responsibility to myself, and others, is to change myself.
Suffering, the Self and Society